Cat Naps: Tips from the Master

There she lies, right on my lap as I’m typing this, sound asleep.

This is a master of her craft and as with any other subject, if you want to learn the tricks of the trade, watch a master at work.

Location, Location, Location

Not just anywhere will do for a catnap. Okay, that statement is totally wrong. Any spot will do as is evidenced by the cat asleep on my lap right now as I fidget and type away. While you and I have comfort issues to deal with, most cats can fit into, around, or upon just about anything comfortably. This is a distinct advantage especially over those of us who have a few years on us and can’t seem to get comfortable anywhere.

A Clean Sleep

Cats usually will give themselves a bath before napping. Since I don’t think you will want to lick yourself all over before retiring, try doing it in a bathtub (taking a bath, not licking yourself all over.) This will relax you for your slumber, though don’t try putting the cat in a bath or you’ll live to regret it; if you survive, that is.

Duration, Duration, Duration

My cat can sleep for 2 minutes or two hours; doesn’t really matter which to her. That is the definition of a catnap and I guess this is just one of the reasons cats seem so happy. If I get woken up too early from a nap I am grumpy the rest of the day. Of course, I was grumpy before I laid myself down, that’s one of the reasons I was trying to nap to begin with. A cat can feel refreshed no matter how short or long the nap and that’s one more reason they are so much better at this than us.

Kitty Attitude

It’s that “Want to” attitude that gets things done. It seems cats take napping way more serious than we do, how else do you explain their expertise at it? If you disturb your cat, she just glares at you and starts over. She may get up and relocate, but they barely wake up to do it. I can’t sleep if there is any noise at all, yet she can sleep through a lawnmower right outside the window. Vacuum cleaners are their nemesis though. Fire up a vacuum cleaner and any cat will run for cover.

Kitty Envy

Yes I have it and I have it bad. My cat can sleep anywhere, anytime and for as long as she wishes. I, on the other hand, can’t seem to get a good night’s sleep anywhere, anytime. While I can never get back to sleep once woken up, she simply glares at me for a second or two, then smugly closes those kitty eyes and drops right back into slumber. Man am I ever jealous or what?

A Little Help Over Here?

So I hate to break it to you, but we will never hone our napping skills to come anywhere close to our cats’ level. Believe me, I have tried and tried to no avail. Luckily for us, another of their tricks is the ability to share a nap. That’s right, just let your cat crawl up on your lap, just like mine is right now and I dare you to stay awake. As a matter of fact, I need to go now.

Meet the Author: Michael Ryan

Michael Ryan is a full-time musician along with a humor, travel and outdoor recreation columnist. He's also an avid skier and golfer and has traveled extensively around the U.S, the Caribbean and Europe. His musical career takes him all over the U.S. and his wife drags him everywhere else. His weekly columns “The Life of Ryan” ran in the Transcript and Sentinel newspaper chain for several years and have been featured in the Denver Post, Rocky Mountain News and Mile High Magazine. He is the co-founder, editor and humor columnist for ColoradoLocalLegends.com and currently resides in Morrison, Colorado.

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